Lesbian Porn for Beginners

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The Hamra Festival was an obvious attraction hub to half the population of Beirut. By half the population, I mean me bumping into most of my queer friends, the concert groupies, the happy, happy families (which include kids in strollers), and the knowledgeable guys. As we were walking back to our car one night, one of them was exposing his thorough understanding of lesbian sex to the bunch of girls hopping around him with squeaks of admiration, we couldn’t but overhear a valuable piece of information.

- Knowledgeable Guy about lesbian sex: And they have sexual practices called… (lowers voice) FISTING.
- (Disgusted) Girl #1: Ewwww!
- (Enthusiastic) Girl #2: Where do you learn all this?

For us, it was obvious: Our epic boaster has been hooked on too much mainstream lesbian porn.

Pornography in itself does not have the property to alienate the viewer’s ability to have sexual partners. And while it’s a tool for sexual arousal, it does not bestow on masturbation the effect of an addictive drug. However, porn designed by heteronormative males – the target audience being… heteronormative males – can be harmful to a high extent when it comes to perpetuated stereotypes about lesbians and fixed assumptions.

First, a disclaimer about fisting: Lesbians are not the only creatures with hands. Anybody can fist, provided nails are properly trimmed and medical gloves are used with the correct amount of lube (and no, 14-centimeter nails on a dry pussy do not constitute the optimal conditions for such a practice).

In a big white bed (replace with sofa or office chair) with red curtains (replace with muslin or silk) and cherry wood (replace with parquet or marble), two (almost) naked women are having some real fun. Does it sound familiar?

Any good porn director knows that for a “successful” lesbian scene, some constituents come at hand.

The “fuck-me” stilettos: Lesbians do not have sex with stilettos on. As a matter of fact, most lesbians I know would wear stilettos as a Halloween costume.

The French manicured 14-centimeter nails: Not only are long nails quite uncomfortable, but they’re also a nest for microbes and can provoke lesions in the vaginal tissues.

The bimbo make-up: Having sex with make-up on is like working in a building site with a tie and a suit.

The sprayed vamp hair: The brunette, the blondie, the redheaded. Have I whetted your appetite?

The stereotypical bodies: Lesbian or not, huge boobs and big asses to a slim body are uncommon outside the artistic touches of a plastic surgeon.

The dry pussy: Women do get (very) wet when aroused. If we don’t, it’s usually a bad sign.

Lack of sincerity and evident fakeness put aside, lesbian sex is pictured as a series of methodic steps to be fulfilled. First comes the licking, then the fingering, then the toys. Then they swap. And for some mysterious reason, they constantly rub their own nipples all along while grunting and inhaling through their teeth. While Labibi affirms that “when they use toys, it’s like they’re stuffing a turkey,” SS wonders “how much that jaw can handle with a stiff tongue out as far as possible. They have to stick their tongues out so much so that the camera can show tongue and clit at the same time.”

Indeed, what mainstream lesbian porn doesn’t tell us is that rubbing a woman’s clit as if dust is being swept off only leads to… a sore clit. It doesn’t tell us that an exclusively vocal orgasm is usually faked. It doesn’t tell us that toys should not be shared. Most of all, it doesn’t tell us that lesbians do not engage in sexual activities with other women to fulfill men’s fantasies, to attract their attention, or to lure them into some sort of naughty sexual scheme.

So for the straight guys out there who include “having sex with a lesbian” as a bullet point on their list of achievements: No, we are not moaning machines. No, our pussy doesn’t have to be shaved. Yes, our tongue does get tired. No, toys and dildos are not a substitute for penises, and no, we are not waiting for a dick to bang us. So if two girls are making out in a bar, it is rude to stare (get over it – they’re not doing it for your own pleasure).

As for me, I like to think of the female bodies as plentiful, and those that press against mine never-ending discoveries. Nothing is as satisfying as the silent orgasm of a woman who’s smiling, eyes closed, or her passionate gasp in mid-sentence while she tightens up around my fingers. And as I hold her with my whole arms and legs, as emotions radiate inside the room, I never worry or care about what a guy would think if he saw us. When bodies slowly put down their resistance, no camera can capture the increased heart beat, the impatient palpitation, and what I read in her eyes.

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Gya is a queer feminist who lives in a pink bedroom in the “2aryeh”. She doesn’t notice the curious setting as she remains in her bubble of unknown poets and mysterious femme fatales. If she’s not busy laying a poem in a cafe on Hamra street while sipping her French Press, she is most probably daydreaming about someone somewhere. Tough life that is. She looks innocent almost all the time, yet being obnoxious is one of her main daggers (or so she was told). Gya likes to live life to the fullest. She can't be put in a box, even if it's pink. She loves strong feelings and colors, and expresses herself with both her body and mind.

21 Responses to “Lesbian Porn for Beginners”

  1. TSLuna

    Dec 15. 2011

    what about gay porn targeted towards a female audience?

    Reply to this comment
  2. Lebanon Rebel

    Oct 29. 2011

    I bow down to you Gya and your PERFECT article.

    Reply to this comment
  3. mira

    Sep 22. 2011

    well said

    Reply to this comment
  4. Camilla

    Apr 11. 2011

    ;-)

    Reply to this comment
  5. JudyMinx

    Dec 03. 2010

    This article is just beautiful! Thanks!
    ps: I’m a porn actress. I’m a lesbian. In my porn work I work with guys and with girls, but I tend to do as little girl-girl porn as possible, because it feels very weird when I’m shooting a porn scene that includes “lesbian sex”, and the filmmaker seems to think he knows better than I do what lesbian sex is, what it is that girls do in bed together.

    Reply to this comment
  6. nisnooz

    Sep 19. 2010

    good shout, Gya! The interesting thing to highlight is that the points you make are not exclusive to the Arab/Lebanese communities, I battle with this in Europe too. Having lived in a few European cities, I came to the sad conclusion that misconceptions about woman-on-woman sex (for those less comfortable with the lezzie label) are exactly the same in Europe as they seem to be in te Arab world. I still have to explain that my partner & I are not femme to appeal to the (disbelieving) men who stare in shock when they realise we’re together, but that we’re girlie because this is how we identify & no, as lipstick non-heteros, we do not need to foreplay together then spread our legs for an almighty guy to penetrate us!
    This -of course- is intrinsically linked to our patriarchal socities: men still rule, even in the most advanced & liberal cities in the world!
    What’s even more sad, is that gay men -internationally- have the same fallacies about female gay sex as the rest of society does. They ask me whether women can be active or passive, why? because a gay man -just like his straight equivalent- does not only self-rate as superior, but believes that his power lies in his penis. Outside the act of penis, there’s no room for active/passive sex because we have no fingers, hands, tongues or endless options of sex toys!

    sigh…

    Reply to this comment
  7. Gya

    Sep 16. 2010

    Thank you all for the hearty comments! It’s really encouraging <3

    @phoenix: you naughty you! 8 years and still counting… ;)

    Reply to this comment
  8. phoenix

    Sep 15. 2010

    Thank you Gya :)
    angri & entertaining at the same time :)

    Question: How mani videos did you have to watch to come out with this great research paper? ;)

    <3

    Reply to this comment
  9. Astrae

    Sep 14. 2010

    Great article. Guys really need to know all of this and stop thinking that lesbians flirt or have sex with each other just to please them! This is horrible. And I think something should be done to fix this grrrr

    Reply to this comment
  10. The Authentic Jay

    Sep 14. 2010

    Oh my god. :O
    It’s all fake? :O
    All of it? :O
    My oglers have been eyeing rated unadulterated fakeness?
    I am shattered.
    SHATTERED.

    Reply to this comment
  11. Athena

    Sep 14. 2010

    Gya that was one of your best … keep writing :)

    Reply to this comment
  12. shant

    Sep 13. 2010

    Thank you Gya … Me thinks you need to write more.

    Reply to this comment
  13. Emcee

    Sep 13. 2010

    Gya! d3asti b2alba!
    last paragraph was heart-warming <3

    Reply to this comment
  14. Jay

    Sep 13. 2010

    Chapeau bas!

    Reply to this comment
  15. Daniel

    Sep 13. 2010

    Loves it! Amazing article indeed. Great job.

    Reply to this comment
  16. The Mug Girl

    Sep 13. 2010

    aaah gya gya.. =)
    amazing!

    Reply to this comment
  17. Dylan

    Sep 13. 2010

    Wow!
    I never thought i’d read this anywhere!
    The details omg hats off!

    Reply to this comment
  18. Amar

    Sep 13. 2010

    Love this – love how you broke it all down. Finally someone is talking about this! Another brilliant piece of writing from the most talented GYA. <3

    Reply to this comment
  19. Aphrodite

    Sep 13. 2010

    Amen to that Gya!
    I just love you!

    Reply to this comment
  20. koi-fish

    Sep 13. 2010

    finally!

    Reply to this comment
  21. Gracia

    Sep 13. 2010

    Great article! :)

    Reply to this comment

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